Edit – well it is now mid-July and although appendix 1 and 2 were written in May I had never gotten around to publishing them or writing more – so much has happened in that for the most part life is back to it’s blissful norm and I am loving it! But for the sake of completely moving on – so these ‘update’ posts will occassionally make an appearance….for now….
Just a wee note – I got so behind in keeping up with this blog that I these posts are catch up posts and so are invariably long and possibly a wee bit long-winded! Hopefully once I am all caught up they will be a bit easier to read and not quite so waffly! Thanks for your patience. x
So where did I leave things? I guess the last real post about my treatment was this one – a few weeks post surgery, just newly married, having started my hormone treatment and awaiting a start date for my radiotherapy treatment. That is a very quick summary of where I was at! So this post – the hormone treatment!
I have struggled all along since starting my hormone treatment. a once a month injection of zoladex – well perhaps injection is not really a great description of it – it is really a whopping great needle putting a pellet into my tummy which hurts like hell! Apparently the fact that I have a bit of ‘padding’ around the tummy area means that it shouldn’t be so bad so for once I thank my lucky stars that I am not a model size 8, 6 or whatever the ideal size is for my diminutive height.
Anyway – that lovely dose of hormones has the delightful effect of turning me into either a sobbing mess or a screaming monster for anything up to 3 to 5 days after. Wonderful. I have taken to trying to convince Mark that he would be better to plan weekends (or a week, or half the month?) with friends after every fourth thursday as I desperately hate the person I become during that time. He is a glutton for punishment though and is sticking it out so far – poor soul. I am sure there are those out there that thing PMT is a myth, an excuse for a woman to have a few days a month where etiquette and niceties can fly out the window and a demanding, explosive, irrational being can take the place of a formally relatively normal human being. Although this is not PMT (as I am now in the menopause – albeit a drug induced ‘fake menopause’) that I am going through, I think the effect on mood and emotions is pretty similar, although in my experience it is multiplied by 10. It is horrible, I become horrible. Thank goodness that as I am writing this I am about to have my 9th injection. As I am on zoladex for 2 years I am already over a third of the way through!! Although that is in itself something to celebrate, such is the impact that it has on my life I am in the same breath cursing the fact that I still have 15 to go. I am never one to wish my life away, infact I am constantly acutely aware of how fast the days go and that I want to grasp every moment and experience it fully, but bloomin heck I will be celebrating on the day that I have my final zoladex injection!!
PS – if you would like to read more about zoladex there is a very medical description here (also describing it’s uses in men with prostrate cancer as well as in the treatment of woman with endometreosis). Macmillan cancer website have a much more user friendly description and information of zoladex here.
I should also add that the effects that I have had with zoladex are my own personal experience and not necessarily the same for everyone. Perhaps I am just a wee bit loopy anyway and this has just brought out the worst in me!